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Seen in another social media site a few minutes ago:
Simple question - where’s the best place to get a Christmas hamster for 3-4 adults? It doesn’t have to be non vegetarian. Ideally it will have nuts, a basket, cheese and fish and nuts. F&M are good but expensive.
M&S are more expensive than they should be.
That provided some good light-hearted banter... 
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Agree.
When even our classmates' (with whom we've spent many younger years together) WhatsApp group discussions sometimes tend to lose civility, the discussions in this Lounge, are never uncivil.
The main reason, I feel, is the enforcement of strict guidelines on top, which forbid political, religious, climate, etc. discussions. And the removal of Soapbox.
modified 2 days ago.
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Amarnath S wrote: And the removal of Soapbox.
I rather liked the Soapbox. True, threads sometimes did get heated, but nothing like some other places.
However, I understand why it was removed.
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
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I think in some ways because it is self policing. There is an interesting thread in Bugs 'n' Sugs which makes the point.
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Thanks Richard! Can you point me to it? I can’t seem to find it.
Mircea
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Grrrr...
But you're right.
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Thanks again Richard! What I see in this discussion, are some polite adults having a difference of opinion and trying to find common ground.
A place where all agree would be incredibly boring, but keeping disagreements within the bounds of civility, that is the true magic.
Mircea
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And that is the very thing that makes a place like this actually usable. Too often people want to hide behind anonymity while slinging personal insults towards people that they don't know. I don't ever find that here. I would absolutely attribute it to soft but firm guidance from the moderator(s). I absolutely love getting my daily emails and clicking on articles that I find interesting. And to whoever creates the story sub-headers in the emails, you are freaking AWESOME!
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Keefer S wrote: And to whoever creates the story sub-headers in the emails, you are freaking AWESOME!
That would be @kent-sharkey By his own admission, he is a mythical figure 
Mircea
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"probably more than I should do"
truth. In fact, this is a huge group of good people. I've been hear since 2000 or so. Back then I was in the middle of my career, now I'm winding down. Many are further ahead, retired, got bored (or finished their house repairs - looking at you Hankey) and are back now fiddling with projects and doing some small time consulting. You started a good post. There are a lot of REALLY smart and intelligent folks here, so don't go shooting your mouth off (looking at me). They will eat you alive in the lounge.
Then again, these sharks are full of information and more than willing to share.
![Rose | [Rose]](https://www.codeproject.com/script/Forums/Images/rose.gif)
PS - would really like to hear from John Simmons aka JSOP again.
Charlie Gilley
“They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
Has never been more appropriate.
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charlieg wrote: PS - would really like to hear from John Simmons aka JSOP again.
Me, too, Charlie.
Will Rogers never met me.
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Policing.
There were a few times where I did cross the line. Having a profile that helps find work and that I'm invested in, I'm not going to risc that for a snarky comment.
Bastard Programmer from Hell 
"If you just follow the bacon Eddy, wherever it leads you, then you won't have to think about politics." -- Some Bell.
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Moderators.
Keep the signal to noise ratio in line.
Audience: Has-been, will-be, are: techies.
>64
Some days the dragon wins. Suck it up.
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True, but ironic. As "nerds" many people see us as a group lacking social skills, yet we have an ethos in the lounge that many social media sites would envy, if only they knew!
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Agree but lacking social skills beats having negative social skills. I have had some good experience in focused groups of Reddit and Discord, but haven't really spent much time there.
Seems like the hate is most obnoxious when politics and such wander in. "You're <subject> wears army drawers". Too easy to be anonymous on the Internet.
>64
Some days the dragon wins. Suck it up.
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Now that's a phrase I've not come across before!
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When I was in the service, it was: "your grandmother wears army shorts". Childish? Of course. We had a lot of kids who hadn't completed high school. Today is far different (just like everything else).
>64
Some days the dragon wins. Suck it up.
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I've been a member since 2001. I think the cultural success of CodeProject should be attributed first and foremost to Chris Maunder & company. Their ongoing tireless efforts to keep CP a useful place to come for technical information and assistance are amazing. At the same time they've managed to keep the site friendly without turning it into an online police state. They've also largely avoided the model used by other sites that member longevity implies you should be allowed to moderate site content. Longevity can mean you're devoted to a place you like, or that you've simply found a target-rich environment to spew vitriol.
The CP membership does deserve some credit. Most of us try not to be asshats here. We've had our share of 'characters' (some of which are still here ) and outright trolls. The thing to notice is that the membership is always changing, yet the culture stays the course.
Software Zen: delete this;
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you said it, gary
"A little time, a little trouble, your better day"
Badfinger
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It is pretty visible that my mother's tongue was not queen's English.
After few months of exposure to ..american.. English I realized that majority of verbal "instructions" are terminated with "...won't you?? " which I interpreted as "...I have given you instruction / answer , which was so obvious.... ".
I believe the success of this forum is that MAJORITY OF participants are in the same boat, not English purists.
PS
for similar reason I value being called " amigo " or " bro " more than being called "friend"....
and that is worth a buck...$
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Salvatore Terress wrote: majority of verbal "instructions" are terminated with "...won't you?? "
Worse, a lot of instructions begin with "why don't you...?"
E.g. Why don't you take out the trash while I do the dishes? -- Because I don't feel like it is why not.
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Answers to the "why don't you...?" question are rarely welcome.
"They have a consciousness, they have a life, they have a soul! Damn you! Let the rabbits wear glasses! Save our brothers! Can I get an amen?"
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Adding to Gary's answer: eliminating the Soapbox. Many liked the feature, but it definitely brought out the worst in some people. Chris unequivocally said "No" when that was closed. My hat is off to him for that decision.
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